Helping Hands
by bluetreeleaves
Summary: AU All my life, I've seen them. All my life, I've ignored them. They can't be real. But now I can't ignore them. And those three strangers I met? They tell me I am powerful and I was lost and an amber-eyed man has been fervently searching for me. But I'm just crazy, right? None of this is real, right?


**Hello and welcome. This is my first story for the Cardcaptors/Tsubasa fandom even though I've always been a huge fan of the manga and anime. This is a bit of an experiment of sorts, so if it doesn't get much love, I'll probably drop it. But I hope you do enjoy it all the same. :) The plot is mostly mine except for some obvious Tsubasa themes. Expect to treat this sort of like an AU. And speaking of ownership...**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing except for maybe some of the plot. Everything else belongs to the lovely people of Clamp.**

**And without further ado, please enjoy. :)**

* * *

The slowing traffic outside my two-story apartment window beeps, shrills, and squeals signaling the never-ending enclave of respective citizens, business suits, and everyone else just trying to make it through another day in this dark city. My green eyes stare determinedly at the fatigue person before me and I sigh with a smile, watching my reflected self with a sense of weariness falling over my shoulders.

"Hi, my name is Sakura Kinomoto… no… I need to be more personable…"

Thinking about what might come across as a normal social interaction, I lift up my hand to give a small, casual wave.

"What's up, everyone? Sakura Kinomoto is my name and I decided to join this therapy group because… because…"

I shake my head hopelessly in the mirror and I see my reflection follow suit. Frowning with a shiver of frustration, a whisper of red zips past my ear. Trying again, I screw what I think is a charming smile on my face and say:

"Hello, I'm Sakura. I am here at this group therapy because… I… see…"

This is pathetic. Just... pathetic... I can't even say it in front of my mirror!

"I see invisible dragonflies!" I blurt out. "And they swarm around me… Oh, God…"

Pathetic, huh?

I put my hand on my forehead and disturb two dragonflies perched there. Rubbing at my temple, I resist the urge to jump in my bed and cover myself with my blanket. This is stupid. Just absolutely, every-sense-of-the-word _stupid_. What can I possibly be thinking going to this meeting? How in the world am I supposed to talk to people about this? _Invisible dragonflies_? Honestly, who would believe such nonsense? They'll think I'm crazy. _I _already think I'm crazy! My green eyes open and stare at my dejected expression. My short auburn hair sticks up slightly in the back from the many times I've pulled on it in frustration. I resist the urge to change out of my blue jeans and green knitted sweater. Turning around from the mirror, my eyes sweep over the train-wreck that is my small apartment as a sour feeling twirls in my stomach. My tiny twin bed is unmade, the green pillows haphazardly thrown to the floor. My closet is spilling with various skirts and shirts signaling the many times I've nervously changed clothes in the past two hours. The clock chimes from the kitchen that I have thirty minutes before I will miss my bus to the city. Maybe I could just skip the therapy session? I am desperate to talk about my problem, but who would believe me? And besides, dragonflies are a harmless insect. They just hang around me like I have some kind of natural ethereal-bug pheromone. They have never done anything to hurt me. They just circle around me and get in my stuff and land on my body and ruin my social life and give me sleepless nights when they perch on my bedspread and all over my room and over everything I own.

No big deal.

I know I am right. Going to group therapy to publically talk about my bugged-out visions (literary) probably won't help a thing! After all these years, finally admitting my mental illness to a room full of strangers is the worst kind of fear. I don't even know if I can say my name in front of a crowd, let along tell them they have a invisible bug crawling on their face. I just can't. This really _is _a problem I can live with. I've survived with it this long. I can handle the rest of my life...

Another streak of red whistles under my chin and a small purr of wings brushes my left arm. I sigh at the sea of red covering my entire room.

Who am I kidding? I need help. Some serious mental help. I have to do this. I have to talk about my problems. I can't keep bottling this up. Sure, I'll sound absolutely batty, but at least maybe someone could tell me what is wrong with me. I've only had my head tested once and that was when I was four years old. There was nothing but a perfectly healthy brain. Maybe I have a pint-sized, ninja tumor that's hidden itself in the recesses of my cerebellum and it's finally growing large enough to really give me some interesting perceptual issues.

I've always seen the dragonflies ever since I can remember though, so hopefully that cancels out the idea that I have brain tumors. But seriously it wasn't as bad as this. They'd come every other month or so. Only two or three at the most. I used to think they were ugly fairies. It was when my parents sent me to a local children's hospital to see a therapist that I learned other people might think seeing invisible bugs is a bit of a weird thing.

I guess that's when I became distant to my parents. Not out of spite or anger or anything. They just didn't understand. And the hospital people didn't treat me wrong or strap me down or give me any weird injections. They just had me talk to some white coated man who called himself a doctor of something. And he mostly asked me if I'd hit my head really hard recently. Several believable lies about not seeing bugs anymore and I was set free within three weeks.

Just in time for school. Elementary was easy. I ignored them. The dragonflies only appeared a handful of times and they were never a lot around. I was happy back then.

When I hit junior high and the dragonflies' appearances and numbers increased a bit more, I never said a word, but I became a lot quieter. Call it fear. Call it stupidity. Call it being a pubescent girl who wanted to fit in with the popular crowd. Ha, what a laugh. I might have tried to act normal, but there was no way "shy Sakura" would be popular. I remained invisible for the most part, which I quickly learned suited me just fine. Breezing through the grades with my head held down and my GPA average. When I got in high school and had full access to a library computer – I was too afraid to look up my condition at home – I finally did my research on my possible mental state as well as the dragonflies themselves.

Schizophrenia? Well, I don't see anything else not real but the dragonflies, so hopefully not. Bipolar disorder? I actually have a very calm personality for the most part. Anxiety? Aside from an annoying vision with bugs, I am perfectly fine. I'm not troubled or angry or depressed or lonely. Okay, maybe I'm a little lonely, but that's what happens when you decide to become a social recluse on your own free will.

Next came looking up the type of dragonfly I was seeing.

Wouldn't you know it? There are no dragonflies with my type of blood-red coloring. Big shocker there, huh? The Red-Veined Darter was too orange. The Vagrant Darter had yellow spots. The Small Scarlet has been the closest red I could find, but my dragonflies have deep amber eyes and longer-than-normal, silver-white wings. Scarlet's wings are usually red like their body. And these are not a normal size either. My brain bugs are five inches long, their wings are at least eight. They are huge! And they all look the same. They could be copies of the same bug. Cloned bugs. Normal dragonfly behavior is an independent predator. They don't swarm like this. And they like to hang out in swampy warm areas. This is the city and the first frost will come any day now. They should all either be dead or have moved on south.

Needless to say, they don't exist in any common or uncommon species of dragonfly. Surprise, surprise.

Like I said before, the bugs were never a huge issue, except for the children's hospital fiasco. Nothing to really complain about. I have always had a high tolerance for pain and with the low-blood pressure comes an easy laid-back attitude. Got it from my father's side, apparently. But that was before I saw them every day. _That_ started when I hit my twenties. I was still fine with it. It was only like two or three at the most following me around.

I had my twenty-six birthday two months ago.

It's never been like this in my life.

They are everywhere.

They cluster around me like a swirling red tornado. I feel them land on my body. They fill the bus when I go to and from work. They sit with me in my office cubicle. They cover my computer monitor. They are in my clothes, hair, shoes, closet. I can't get rid of them. Because they are in my screwed up mind. I've never taken drugs. I've never used a hallucinogen. I drank only three times in high school and that was only lightly mixed drinks. Nothing to cause any problems. I've never even been drunk before.

I really need help here. I can't keep ignoring something that has gotten exceedingly worse. These visions are effecting my life. I've never been on a proper date because of this. I've never had a boyfriend or best friend or went to the movies. But honestly, tell me what man would want a mentally unstable woman? Especially one who sees swarms of invisible bugs on a daily basis? What man would want a woman who was probably clinically crazy and deserved to be in a mental facility? I was lucky to get my job through my dad, but I just do the same thing I've always done since I was eleven years old: avoid everyone and get my work done.

I clinch my fists till my knuckles are white. Spinning around, I plant a strangely stretched grin on my mouth.

"Hey, everyone... I…" The words catch in my throat.

Damn it.

My green eyes dance briefly to the closed window and I see that the afternoon is fading. I exhale slowly out of my mouth. Echoes of little red bodies thump gently against the wall, my mirror, and on my ceiling. There's more than twenty of them on my bedspread, at least fifty more on the floor, another twenty – give or take - on my tossed clothes in the closet, and about eight on my small dresser.

Fifteen are on my sweater and twelve more on my pants and feet.

Four are in my hair.

All with the same coloring. All waiting to follow me wherever I go. My own little army of red flies.

Neat.

A purr of blurring wings zips past my cheek and a dragonfly is in my face. Its large amber orbs reflect my tired green eyes. It glides back and forth, its wings beating the air beautifully. The bug lands perfectly balanced on my deodorant and looks at me silently. I stare back down at it, waiting to see if it will do something-_anything_ remotely interesting at all. _Say something to me. Reveal your true purposes for following me everywhere I go. Why do you stare at me like that with that silly blank expression? What the hell are you? Tell me._

But no. The insect is quiet; its blood-red body twitching slightly as it tries to keep its strange long tail straight. After two full minutes of time-waste staring, the dragonfly decides it's had enough of our useless stand-off and –with a small quirk of its white wings - it launches in the air and slips over my shoulder.

I sigh deeply. Fifteen minutes till the bus comes and it's a ten minute walk to the bus station. As another bug swirls quickly around my body and lands on my shoulder, I shake my head once more.

This is getting absurd. Maybe I need to be committed.

Either way, I've had it.

I turn around from the mirror, stroll over to the door to grab my silver purse from the hanger, and slip on my boots. I've learned long ago that the dragonflies will instinctively get out of my way whenever I need to put on a particular piece of clothing or cook with something or move something to somewhere else. It's like they move with my thoughts…

Well, they are in my mind, so I guess that makes sense.

I almost gasp as more than sixty dragonflies land on my black coat and an innumerable amount swirl around my body.

"I guess it _is_ cold outside." I agree quietly and grab the coat. Slipping my arms through, I notice the front door is now a wall of red and silver wings.

_God help me._

* * *

I slip off the warm bus into the darkening streets of the city. Several people brush past me to clamor on and one lady bumps my shoulder. Dragonflies flutter off my coat and several settle back down on the bus bench beside me. The wind hits against my body with a small whistling chill and I cringe as my face burns with the cold.

I hate winter.

The buzzing around my ears informs me that the dragonflies aren't having any issues with the blustering weather at all. I notice three on my forearm and I allow myself a pang of jealousy. They are in my brain, so they should be effected by cold, too. Where's the fairness in this?

Sighing with my breath misting out, I turn to dig in my purse with frozen fingers. The small brochure I'd picked up had a sugar-sweet cover of three friends holding hands and smiling. Above in dark green print were the words: "Helpful Minds: Together we share, together we care." Under the cheesy, happy picture were a three full paragraphs of "acceptance is the key to healing" and "a physical flight stops a mental fight" and "don't be scared of yourself and see the world through different eyes".

What the hell does that even mean? This is all just gibberish.

Two dragonflies land on the edge of the brochure and look up at me. I can practically sense the mild abhorrence radiating from their amber eyes. Or maybe that is my own personal feelings projecting back towards me. After all, I had just been warring with myself for the past few hours on even _going _to this thing. Now that I am more than halfway there, the urge to run back to my apartment is practically overwhelming.

"Don't look at me like that. You started it…" I whisper to them. They remain silent like usual. Three more join the brochure. I flip the paper over for the map on the back and they flutter out of the way. Down about three blocks from here in a small office conference room. There should be a sign on the front door.

Might as well start walking and get this over with.

Tucking the brochure back into my purse, I lace my arms over my chest and walk quickly down the sidewalk. I tuck my head down and hunch my back – my usual, anti-social gait. Red blurs signal past my face, but my mind immediately wanders back to the introduction speech I am about to give. How was I going to pull this off and sound normal? Thinking back on the brochure, I mentally shake my head. This is stupid. I won't sound normal because there won't be anything normal about this! Everyone here tonight will have mental issues. Maybe not _mine _specifically, but hopefully something similar. Maybe I can make a friend here. Maybe there actually _is _someone who can see the dragonflies like me. Maybe…

I gasp in surprise as a person brushes past me and knocks me slightly off-balance. How rude. The person didn't even acknowledge that they hit me. Seriously, the nerve of some people-

Wait.

The dragonflies land back on me gently as I stop walking and stare in disbelief at the person marching away from me.

I can't believe it. There's no way that this is true.

But it is…

A stream of the most beautiful golden butterflies flutter past me… they circle the person like swirling fairies. Their lovely shimmering wings flutter so exquisitely smooth, gliding after the stranger; landing on the person's back and shoulders, brushing their little feet on top of a black beanie cap. I can only watch as the person walks further and further away from me because I am in a state of complete shock.

This… this can't be happening.

Someone else is haunted by these things? There actually _is _someone else like me? Maybe they know what this means! Maybe they can explain what exactly these bug visions are!

Unthinkingly, I pick up my pace and jog closer to the stranger.

I want to call out, but I can't. After all these years, my shyness has become a strong part of my personality. I can only study the stranger through the glittering flock. Much taller than me, broad shoulders, obviously a man. His back is hunched in his long, black coat and his head is down watching his feet. The butterflies are everywhere! They almost make him twinkle like a shining beacon. My heart races and my blood rushes through my veins as I pick up my pace.

Geez, this guy has a long stride. I'm having trouble keeping up.

Two blocks later and I see him stop and turn towards a building. For some idiotic reason, I duck behind a tree trunk so thin that would hardly hide my body. Thankfully, he's not looking behind himself, but takes several steps closer to the door. Excitement and a twinge of fear rush down my spine as I watch him hesitantly lift a hand and knock on the wooden panel of the door. I can't see his face. Darn it.

Emerging from the small tree, I approach the door slowly as an older lady emerges, smiles brightly, gives him an inaudible greeting, and lets him in. For the first time in months, a genuine feeling of relief creeps into my body as the butterflies hurry after him and the door slams shut. My dragonflies have obviously felt my thrill. They perch obediently all over my body and feet, but their tails are twitching. Three land on my face. A strange pang of irrational envy hits me. _He_ gets golden magical butterflies and _I _get these things?

Then a sudden thought stops me and almost makes me back into the street. What if he doesn't see them? What if I actually do have an increasing form of schizophrenia and I'm the only one who can see them? I just want so bad to have someone else with this same issue as me that I'm imagining butterflies on the first random person I see. Especially one that almost knocked me over and didn't even apologize!

Thankfully, the rational - and exceedingly more intelligent - part of my thought process kicks in instantaneously.

_Why would he go to this meeting if he didn't see the butterflies? And if it is a growing problem in your brain, then you are in the right place to get help for it. Now calm down and don't be an idiot._

I glance down at the draping red bugs that envelope my clothes and back to the door in front of me. There's a sign on the window next to the door.

"Helpful Minds Introduction Meeting 6:30-8. Everyone welcome. Snacks provided."

Snacks provided?

Don't mind if I do, I guess.

I knock on the door with a soft knuckle and the sweet lady greets me with the same encouraging smile. I want to smile back, but five of my dragonflies are zipping around her head. So distracting.

It is warm inside and a little cramped, but I've always been a fan of small spaces. My apartment bathroom could fit in this hallway. There weren't many decorations, only a small plaque of some achievement of sorts.

Probably for fixing crazy people.

The older woman takes my coat and an eruption of red swirling dragonfly wings purr in the air. I automatically resist the urge to brush the bugs away as they land close to my eyes. I smile as she says something in a soft sweet voice, but I hardly pay attention to her. I am too busy looking down the hall for a glimpse of gold. The woman points to the open doorway all the way at the back and I nod hesitantly.

Here we go.

Stepping through the open doorway, my sense of sight is bombarded by cheesy flamboyant posters splattered up and down the walls. I am promptly reminded of the brochure. Too many smiling, happy people looking like they have just had the best day of their lives. Arms around each other, giggling, hugging. An utterly perfect collage of companionship and camaraderie. Banners of "Never let go of your visions", "seize the moment", "life is the greatest gift and treasure", "reach your goals", "dreams are a wish your heart makes" are enough to make goose-bumps rise on my arms. I look at the first banner and cringe inside. Ugh. Try seeing invisible bugs all of your life. "Never let go of your visions" has a very different meaning when you enter in that particular detail.

There are stacks of folding chairs on the side of the back wall. The room isn't big, but I notice there aren't very many people anyway. An older couple stands near the snack table. A dark-headed man who younger than me is setting up chairs into a circle. His glasses are round and he reminds me of a book character that was popular for a while. Harry-something. I don't know. A small girl with long, curling dark locks leans on the wall near him and messing around with an iPad. She looks up at me and I immediately look away. I search for golden butterflies and try to swallow down the pang of disappointment. He's not in here. Maybe he went to the bathroom?

The silence in the room is unsettling and I make myself walk to the snack table. My natural shy nature kicks into overdrive as the couple turns to look at me. The woman's jet black hair is swirled in an outrageous up-do, complete with chopsticks pinning it to her scalp. Her dark maroon coat and long high heels are intimidating enough without her deep set eyes flicking up and down my body. She is irresistibly exotic looking which compliments well with her standoffish demeanor. The man beside her looks kinder. I sense something weird about him. Ha. I guess I'm one to talk about weird people. He has square glasses and a simple baseball cap with the logo of some sports team or another on the front. He holds her hand and I sense more than see her grasp his fingers tightly. She mutters something to him and he shushes her. I avoid their pin-pricking eyes and pick up a plate for several slices of apple. My dragonflies settle all over the food. I feel kind of bad since if they were real, they'd be ruining the snacks. But since they aren't, I guess it doesn't-

"Hi, there."

The small, chiming voice surprises me and I loudly drop the serving tweezers. Swiveling my head, I see the long-haired girl who had been playing with the iPad earlier. I swallow as more than ten dragonflies circle around her. I watch quickly to see if her unusual violet eyes will follow their movements. She keeps staring at me.

Drat.

"Hi," I answer quietly and turn around to pick up the tweezers once more. I pinch three grapes on my plate and move to the square blocks of cheese.

"My name is Tomoyo Daidouji. I saw you earlier this week. At the sandwich shop, right?" The girl's voice is so squeaky. It's kind of weird sounding. Like she has breathing problems or something. She moves beside me and grabs a plate of her own. "I was the one who handed you the brochure. I'm so glad you came. Many people made fun of me on the streets for publically handing out group therapy brochures, but, like I always say: if you don't try reach out to help then who will?"

I remember her now. She handed me the brochure outside Jimbo's Sandwiches where I get my usual turkey on wheat. The thought that she remembers me so easily both startles and flatters me. I glance back at her and see my dragonflies are crawling on her neck and shoulders. She'll change her tune once she hears what a nutcase I am.

"Sakura Kinomoto," I mumble, picking up a provolone square.

"I love your eyes, Kinomoto-san! They are such an amazing green! It's like you can see into another world or something."

"Thank you," I whisper, feeling the stares of the couple on the left side of my face. I just want to disappear. Another world? She has _no idea_.

"You must have some interesting stories to share. I can't wait to get to know you better. Try the little cupcakes! I made them myself."

I start for the icing treats, but freeze as her statement hits me solid. Slowly, my eyes revolve back to her beaming face. She can't wait to get to know me better? How could she like me so much already? Once she knows me, she'll probably think I am the weirdest person ever. I know I should try to enjoy the social interaction as much as possible while I still have it.

But… I'm no longer good at social interactions…

"Are you okay, Kinomoto-san?" The girl – What was her name? Tomoyo Daidouji! – asks as a flash of worry appears underneath her perpetual grin. "I swear I haven't poisoned the cupcakes or anything."

"No, it's not that." I feel a blush hit my face as a dragonfly lands on my nose. Invisible to her, irritating to me. "How many people are you expecting to show up tonight, Daidouji-san?" _Someone with golden butterflies perhaps?_ I add in my head.

"Probably only a few more. I should introduce you to Eriol-kun. He's the leader of this little group, but I'm always the planner when it comes to the both of us. And don't you worry, I have a very easy day scheduled. We are going to talk about ourselves- nothing of our problems or anxieties or fears. I mean, you _can _if you want to, but I'd like to focus on the stress-free parts. Just… who we are, what we like, jobs, favorite colors or favorite pair of shoes. Anything you want, really."

"He's the one setting up chairs?" I guess pointing at the smaller built man who is now scooting the circle a bit closer. I feel a small tension curl in my stomach.

Public speaking… I knew shouldn't have come…

"Yep. His name is Eriol Hiiragizawa. My partner in crime, so to speak. Why don't you take a seat in the circle? I know there will be at least one other person joining us besides Mr. and Ms. Reed here. And who knows? Maybe more will join us as more sessions happen."

Swallowing and nodding, I take my small helping of snacks and retreat to a chair in the circle. I'm the only one sitting down, so it's kind of awkward. I start to chide myself for even coming here tonight. What could I have been thinking that these people would accept me? Red dragonflies surrounding me constantly? This is going to be beyond embarrassing.

I've just bitten into an apple before-

"Hello, I'm Eriol Hiiragizawa. It's nice to meet you and thank you for coming."

The voice is a smooth tenor and it rings pleasantly in my ears. My dragonfly companions were just settling down and several flutter up as Hiiragizawa-san goes to sit on the chair beside me. His hair is nicely groomed with longish bangs covering his forehead. Good natured eyes reflect gently from behind his round glasses. He has such clear white skin, just like the Tomoyo girl. I am immediately intimidated by the two of them. He gives me an easy smile, which I can't return. Five dragonflies are on top of his head.

"Sakura Kinomoto," I mumble into my lap. I shouldn't have come. I shouldn't have come. I knew I'd regret this.

"I see you got a cupcake. Good. Tomoyo loves to watch people eat her baking."

"It looks good." My green eyes stare at the little cake muffin like a lifeline. An awkward silence falls between us. I can feel his gaze still on my face. Why does he keep staring at me? Is he smiling? Frowning? I shyly take another bite of apple, but hate the sound of loud crunching it makes.

I swallow down the fruit and my relief as Hiiragizawa finally looks away from me and announces, "If everyone would please take their seats around the circle, we can get started."

My green eyes lift hopefully to find the butterfly guy, but Tomoyo and the couple are the only ones to answer the summons. I glance behind me at the doorway and wish I had chosen a seat where I could watch it. The exquisite black-haired woman leaves an empty chair next to me and I see she's wrenching her purse's silver handle with white knuckles. Apparently I'm not the only one who is uncomfortable being here.

It's a bit reassuring.

"First, let's go with names and one thing interesting about yourselves." Hiiragizawa says once everyone is settled. "I am Eriol Hiiragizawa and I love to collect art. Sculptures actually. I love scanning museums for the strangest pieces imaginable. The more abstract, the better. It makes the imagination really open up to some interesting possibilities."

He grins happily around the circle and I feel the sour dread of having to speak up next. I'm supposed to say one thing interesting about myself? What the hell is interesting about me besides the fluttering insects circling our heads at this very moment? I have no interests. I don't really have any books or movies I like. I'm just dull. Except for one exception…

Just as the silence begins to stretch to an unnatural length and my palms begin to sweat, Daidouji – who was sitting on Hiiragizawa's other side squeaks out, "My name is Tomoyo Daidouji. I like to bake, sew all my own clothes, and want to be a director for movies someday. It might be just little independent films, but as long as I'm behind a camera, I'll be happy. It's been my dream since I was a child."

The chair next to Tomoyo is the man from the snack table. He says in a cool voice, "Claus Reed, philanthropist and environmental scientist. I give to charity works, soup kitchens, and blood donation banks. My family inherited a large fortune and I want to use every penny to make this world a better place. I'm currently working on a recycling fund that will better the reuse of tin cans."

"How noble," Hiiragizawa nods his head in approval and Daidouji gives the man a breath-taking smile. I feel the sick, twisting nervousness rise to the back of my throat. Everyone has something they are interested in. What the hell am I even interested in? My hands quiver as I hold the plastic plate and four disturbed dragonflies lift off into the air. I'll definitely for sure have to talk after the scary woman. I gotta think of something normal.

"M-My name… I… I…" Blinking out of my panic, I glance at the dark woman. Her fingers tremble so horribly that her purse slips from her hands and drops to the floor in the middle of the circle. A small tube of lipstick and her wallet clatter out. My eyes fall on the man next to her and I see the sharp change in his expression. His kind eyes flash with a strange shimmer. Then he smiles easily, swoops down, and scoops up the fallen artifact. Meanwhile. his wife's dark eyes are flitting around the room and she looks like a completely different person from before. She brushes her thigh briefly, forcing the dragonflies perching there to fly away.

"Please, continue, Yuuko." Mr. Reed nods at his wife.

"I… see things…"

"What type of things?" Daidouji encourages softly.

"Things that aren't there…" She whispers hesitantly, her dark eyes sliding over the various people sitting around her. They slowly roll to the floor where most of the dragonflies have landed. "Things that are lost."

No one notices the breath that catches in my throat.

_What?_

"What are these lost things, Ms. Reed?" Hiiragizawa asks gently, leaning forward in his chair in interest. I glance at Mr. Reed and meet his gaze. I resist the urge to look away. Behind his glasses, his eyes are shimmering again– not with any type of emotion, but with something else. A shiver of recognition makes my blood run cold. My hands leave the small plate and I grab the bottom of my chair to keep from bolting out of the room. My dragonflies start to lift off in a disturbed flurry. They are swirling and buzzing all around the circle of chairs like a twister.

What is going on? What is wrong with me? Beside me, the woman is still choking on her words.

"I s-see…t-there's m-mag…" To my complete astonishment and horror, her black eyes look at my face and I see the shadow of the dignified woman from before underneath her stuttering.

"The… magic…"

At her words, a swarm of dragonflies perch on her body and she squeals brushing them away. My stomach is recoiling. I accidentally drop my plate that balances on my knees. The uneaten fruit rolls on the floor. I can't seem to breathe properly. My heart is racing. My blood pulsing with a feverish chill and it races up and down my spine to my neck. It's a familiar feeling. My brain is trying to remember. Why is this happening right now? Who are these people?

"Get it away…" She looks like she's about to cry. She jumps from her chair and clings to Mr. Reed. "Get it off of me, brother! We never did this to her! Why are they after me?"

Somewhere in my shock, my mind thinks, _Brother? I thought they were married._

"Ms. Reed, do you need to step out of the room?" Hiiragizawa's smooth voice sounds unperturbed by these events. I shoot both him and Tomoyo a look of disbelief. They have the same calm expression, but the tension in the air feels like it's laced us in an invisible cage. What is this feeling? I know what this is… but then I don't.

"The magic… has found…"

A golden butterfly flutters over my shoulder and the chills stop. It's as if this simple creature is breaking the fierce spell that has gripped me. I gasp and look immediately over my shoulder. My eyes hit brilliant red and amber. Four dragonflies jump into my face and now buzz in my vision. I watch them fly off and dart quickly towards the stranger standing at the doorway. Butterflies of the purest beauty join with red dragonflies, swirling and mixing. The fury of the bugs covers the stranger's face standing at the doorway.

I hear Tomoyo jump from her folding chair behind me and squeal, "Oh! Our last guest has arrived!"

"_You_…" Ms. Reed whispers under her breath, staring at the stranger.

The bugs part together and I finally see him. His mouth is slightly open as his amber eyes stay with mine. Though he is still wearing the beanie, he's abandoned his large black coat. He's wearing a simple, gray long-sleeved t-shirt and jeans. His curling brown hair sticks out of the cap and falls a little off his forehead. I am right. He is about my age, though much, much taller. The way his back is slightly hunched makes me think he's had some hard years recently. His handsome face changes to a sharp frown and his eyes harden as he gazes over my shoulder. I feel a squirm of gloom. A butterfly lands on my shoulder and I glance at it then back at him quickly. He doesn't even register its existence.

Damn.

"Does she need some help?" He asks in a smooth, but edgy voice. It vibrates strangely and I get another type of chill. Like a memory that's been forgotten, but it's on the tip of my mind. I feel like if I strain hard enough, the memory will come. Unfortunately it just makes my brain hurt.

My dragonflies tumble with the butterflies with a flurry of wings above and around the circle of chairs.

He strolls up to the group and Mr. and Ms. Reed stand up together. Ms. Reed is staring at the stranger and me in turn, her face contorting into a scary scowl. Four butterflies and three dragonflies land on the two of them and she wrenches herself away from her brother.

"This power isn't yours. How do you possess it?"

I am completely lost. I look from one stranger to the next wanting to disappear forever. Hiiragizawa and Daidouji are watching the scene. Their dark eyes have a mirrored spark of triumph. A strange thing to see when a large woman begins freaking out at their first meeting for group therapy.

Yeah, no big deal.

"I have no power, Yuuko-san. You took it from me as my price in another lifetime." The stranger says calmly to woman and Ms. Reed's dark eyes flicker back and forth like she's confused. "I think you should take your _sister_ and go home, _Claus Reed_." Despite his gentle words, I notice his fists are clenched. I hope I'm imaging it, but I think I see him move closer to me. Instantly, uncountable butterflies and dragonflies land on my body. I can't help the little scream that escapes my throat as I realize I am now completely covered in flapping winged bugs. I hold my arms out away from my body as more butterflies squish in with the dragonflies. I probably look like an absolute idiot to someone who can't see these creatures.

It tickles horribly.

But seriously.

What the _hell!?_

Everyone ignores me, which I think is just fine. Claus leans to the tall woman's ear and I hear him whisper something about "a temple". She's muttering incoherent words now and raises her hands to clinging back on Claus. With one hand, he gently guides her out of the circle and close to the exit.

Just as her foot hits the doorway, Yuuko decides to go completely batty. Thrashing against Claus' arms, her long dark hair falling out of the chopsticks, "She shouldn't have them! Those _things_! They found the wrong one!" Reed drags her down the hallway and I can still hear her yelling until the front door audibly slams shut.

The silence that follows is deep and awkward. I wonder if I should just run for it, but I don't want to meet the crazy lady outside.

Suddenly, the bugs take off and I am in a whirl of red and gold for a few seconds. As the butterflies and dragonflies find respective places on the now empty chairs and floor, I turn to the amber-eyed stranger. He's looking at Hiiragizawa and Daidouji with a fierce glare.

"Why did you do this?" He hisses at Hiiragizawa.

"Why did I do what? I'm just trying to help those in need." His tone was pleasant and light. He even has a growing smile. I feel like an intruder on a fight I have no place being a part of and yet I know they are talking about me. "Together we share, together we care, right?"

"You know _exactly_ what I mean. You know she"- He stops and glances at me. I feel the wash of familiar chills again. The bugs near me respond with a purr of swirling wings "-this was dangerous and stupid, Eriol."

"Aren't you glad? I found _her_, Syaoran-kun." Hiiragizawa says lightly, gesturing to me. I open my mouth to speak up, but the man cuts me off.

"This was the wrong way of doing it! You even let this world's Yuuko and Clow in here. You have got to be several shades off to do this behind my back! I knew I should have never let you join my search for her. Even if you are his reincarnation, it doesn't mean that _he_ will understand what is going on. He's from another dimension. "

A flash of Claus Reed's sharp eyes hits my memory. Whatever is happening right now, that man _did_ understand something.

I, on the other hand, am drowning in the ocean of cluelessness.

"He _is_ me." Hiiragizawa murmurs. "He brought Yuuko because I asked him to. He understands how important it is for everyone that she gets found and soon. Just because you may have lost hope in this particular Sakura doesn't mean I have. There's something about her that I can sense. She's different from all the others. Trust in us to help you find her."

Whoa, they're seriously talking about me like I'm not in the room. So much for finding normal people to talk to.

Seeking public group therapy. That'll show me.

"Confronting her like this? Making us sound completely crazy? How is this helping, Eriol?"

I'm surprised when Daidouji immediately leaps from her chair with a scowl. It looks weird on her cherub face. "Don't you blame this on Eriol! My poor Sakura-chan has been lost for so long! Look at her! You claim to love her, Syaoran? You've paid a price to find her? Look at her now! Look at her eyes! She's scared and confused and powerless! I wonder what she's gone through in this life without her gift. She's the right one! You haven't even noticed that the part she left with you has found her again. Look at her!"

All eyes turn on me and all I can comprehend is the familiar way the girl said my name. "My-my poor _what_?" I gasp out, my pulse racing like a two-mile run. Finally, I find my voice. Standing from my chair, I trip on it slightly as I back away to the door. "I don't know _any of you! _What are you talking about? Powerless? Burdened? What the hell is going on?"

The man – Syaoran? – gives them both a strained expression and closes his amber eyes as if in pain. I watch as he grabs the beanie from his head and turns away from me. His brown hair is a mess. He covers his eyes with his palms. "I told you. She doesn't know anything. She wouldn't know. Not about the cards, Kero, Yue, you or me. Nothing. This was stupid and dangerous. This is a different Sakura just like all the others. She doesn't remember me. It isn't _the one_."

"You don't see it, Syaoran, but I do." Daidouji whispers in her small voice. "It's manifested itself into another form, but the magic found her. That's what Yuuko was trying to say before you barged in. She can't use her magic because she doesn't know _how_, so it waits for her to remember. Even the part of her magic she left you with has begun to realize who she is."

"You mean the dragonflies and butterflies?" I interrupt with a thick voice. They all turn as one to look at me like they forgot I am even there. God, that is so unnerving!

"Dragonflies, Kinomoto-san?" Hiiragizawa asks kindly, as if he hasn't just been verbally spanked for the past minute.

I can't speak. My mouth flops open like a fish and I freeze.

Daidouji saves me. "She means the red dragonflies that are all over this room. I can see them. The power isn't supposed to exist here, so it's taken the form it could relate to. Symbolically speaking, the dragonfly is one of dreams, intuition, and visions. You've always been very intuitive, Sakura-chan." She smiles at me and I blink back at her.

"She doesn't know you. Don't speak to her with such familiarity." Syaoran reprimands angrily.

"Even if she doesn't right now, she will. This is the right one. Even though this world doesn't allow her to have magic power, once she remembers, everything will come back to her regardless of this world's rules or not."

I finally find my voice.

"I don't have power… I don't understand… I'm just crazy, that's all." I feel my hands begin to shake as the chills rush down my spine. Everyone shoots me looks of concern except for Syaoran. His eyebrows have knotted up and his amber eyes reflect a powerful ache. A thick knot from deep in my soul suddenly erupts at his pained look and I am instantly talking.

"You guys are saying I'm from a different time. A different world. I don't understand anything you are saying. This is weird and stupid and giving me a headache. I see the dragonflies, but no one else does. I've never told anyone about it. I came here to get this off my chest. To maybe seek professional help." I laugh wildly and realize several tears have trailed from my eyes. "Oh, God, I'm crying now. This is pathetic. You guys were supposed to help me! But you are crazier than me! I have been curse with this. Cursed with seeing these dragonflies flying all around me. It's gotten progressively worse. I'll never find anyone who can cure me." I turn to the amber stranger and gesture around the room with fingers spread out. "Syaoran, is it? You knocked into me on the street on the way here, you bastard. You didn't even say sorry or anything! But you have the most beautiful golden butterflies all around you. They circled you and twirled around you. They are the most gorgeous little creatures I've ever seen. I thought that if I followed you and maybe you came to the meeting on the brochure, you'd tell me I'm not alone. But here you are saying these bugs that I see are little manifestations of _magic_? Magic that can't be used in this particular world_? Because it's from another dimension? _What a load of crap! The dragonflies are anything but magical. They are annoying and ugly and I can't stand it anymore! They aren't _real_! Oh, god…" I gasp as a frightening thought crosses my brain. I hardly realize I'm saying these words out loud. "Maybe none of you are real… maybe I really do have a growing case of schizophrenia."

I back away further and both Hiiragizawa and Daidouji take several steps to follow me.

"I have to get out of here." I wipe the tears from my cheeks. "I have to get home. This isn't real."

"Butterflies…" Syaoran whispers, his expression of surprise and longing enveloping on his face.

"The magic she left with you, Syaoran," Daidouji nods her head. "Butterflies are the symbol of love."

"Oh, god, get me out of here!" I yell wildly and race to the hallway. I ignore my coat and wrench the front door open. I hear a faint shout of "Sakura!" from the stranger, but I keep going. The cold wind hurts my tear-filled eyes.

They are all insane. I shouldn't have come. I knew I shouldn't have come.

I didn't know it at the time, but I had a stream of red and gold following closely behind me.

* * *

**And thus begins my little story. If you liked it, please let me know through favorite, alert, review... pick your poison. I appreciate anyone just clicking on it and getting this far. I'll continue it if I get some positive feedback. **

**Thanks again. If you enjoyed this story, check out my other work. I write for Escaflowne and Spirited Away most of the time, but all of my Escaflowne are AU stories, so its original plot by yours truly. **

**Thanks again!**

**blue...**


End file.
